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Heather's Dish

Heather's Dish

My Heart Knows Yours

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The other day I was watching Wes play in his diaper (his favorite outfit to play in!) when I caught site of his bellybutton.

 

Now I know to some that may sound random, and just to clarify I’ve seen his bellybutton countless times per day for the past {almost} eleven months.  It’s not a new site in this household.  But that day it just struck me – that little bellybutton is a visible (not to mention adorable) sign of the life that once lived in me.  That little wrinkled dip in my baby’s tummy is where I fed and sustained him for 41.5 weeks.  It’s where he grew and grew and grew, magically and by no power of mine.

 

I look at his bellybutton and stick my finger on it.  He lets out a shrill giggle and rolls over to crawl somewhere – I imagine he thinks he’s escaping to some faraway space as he climbs the mountain of couch pillows protecting him from the brick fireplace.  I watch this little man, active and brave, and I remember a time when I didn’t know who he was or who he would.

 

But my heart knew his. 

 

I can’t find a trace of that by a mark on his body, but I know the imprint of love he has left on my heart since the moment I knew I was pregnant.  I remember the times of fear that I faced while I was pregnant, and then I remember knowing that Wes was inside of me.  It made me brave, it made me fight for truth.

 

It made me love.

 

My heart knows his.

 

I watch my son now, growing daily into a strong and loving little boy.  He smiles and my heart melts; he laughs and I almost cry out because it feels like that puddle of a heart will burst at any moment.  He throws his food on the floor for the billionth time and I get frustrated, but one soft ruffling of his hair and I forget any frustration I had.  He reaches for everything, all the time, and I can’t help but wish that I went after things with utter abandon like he does.  Wes doesn’t know rejection, he doesn’t know yet that life is hard.  He’ll learn one day, but for now he just thirsts for experiences and discoveries.

 

My heart knows yours.

 

My sweet boy, your daddy and I love you more than you could ever imagine.  God has already used you to make huge changes in the hearts of two people; my prayer is that as you grow you will become the man, the leader, that I’ve always known you to be.  When you were just a tiny little guy in my tummy – even then you were strong and brave and comforting.  You helped lead your mommy to be the woman she has wanted to be for a very long time.  You may not have a mark on your body of this, but my heart has always known yours.  I love you sweet boy.

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Comments

  1. Delishhh says

    February 4, 2013 at 10:01 pm

    Put tears in my eyed. . .

    Reply
  2. Kim in MD says

    February 1, 2013 at 9:05 am

    Beautiful post, as always!

    Reply
  3. Cara says

    January 31, 2013 at 4:28 pm

    I LOVE this post. I am 34.5 weeks pregnant now and I know already that motherhood has changed me for the better. Loving this little being inside of me, caring and protecting him or her, is something I could hardly have imagined before and I know it’s just going to multiply. Can’t wait!

    Reply
    • Heather says

      January 31, 2013 at 8:02 pm

      Girl, just you wait – I thought I was in love before, but it gets so much better when you get to hold them!

      Reply
  4. Feast on the Cheap says

    January 31, 2013 at 12:55 pm

    oh I feel the same way about my little guy (7 months old). these babes are so amazing and while there are tough days, i feel so lucky to be his mom. he’s the most fascinating, interesting person I know. i just love him…completely.

    Reply
  5. lindsay says

    January 30, 2013 at 4:44 pm

    this makes me smile. Your soul, it’s beautiful

    Reply
    • Heather says

      January 30, 2013 at 8:23 pm

      You make me smile 🙂

      Reply
  6. Aggie says

    January 30, 2013 at 1:07 pm

    This is the sweetest, most beautiful post. Being a mom is truly the most special thing in the world.

    Reply
  7. Urban Wife says

    January 30, 2013 at 9:41 am

    So perfectly written, Heather. I just cried and then smiled, thinking about our own little son growing in my tummy.

    Reply
  8. Katie says

    January 30, 2013 at 9:30 am

    Beautiful. Just beautiful.

    Reply

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Just a couple quick reminders: ⭐️ healthy doe Just a couple quick reminders:

⭐️ healthy doesn’t have to be hard
⭐️ you’re allowed to “mess up”
⭐️ you’re allowed to be multidimensional
⭐️ don’t overcomplicate it 
⭐️ YOU ARE CAPABLE 

I have so many thoughts swirling around in my head these days, and half the time I don’t know which way is up. But I do know this: focusing on simplicity is the name of the game this year for me. It starts with the things I can control: my food intake, moving my body, my thoughts, my actions. The rest will stem from there!

Does anyone even do a word of the year anymore after 2020? If you do I’d love to see you share it below!
“I’m angry with God.” With those 4 words my “I’m angry with God.”

With those 4 words my Daddy forever changed the way I saw God. A pillar of fire didn’t come from the sky, the ground didn’t open up and swallow him whole, we didn’t get in a car wreck on the way home from piano lessons. And my Daddy never turned his heart from God; a short 20 minutes later we sat down at the dinner table and he praised him through prayer before we ate dinner. 

He taught me that when we are sad or frustrated or anxious or angry or feel that surely the weight of life will kill us - God is big enough to handle those feelings. Not just handle them, but walk closer than our breath through them. He cares, he’s there, and he even wants us to tell him. The more I think about it the more I see that my dad sharing his anger with God was the most honest display of faith I had seen up to that point.

The other day I uttered those same words in front of my boys, “I’m angry with God.” Just like me, they looked around to see where my smiting would come from, likely shocked (as I was) when it didn’t come. And just like me, they will see their parent praise God even in the midst of a firestorm of emotion. 

Why? Because God is good no matter what. My life feels like it’s crumbling before my eyes and I have no way of stopping it...but He is still on his throne. I will praise him no matter the circumstances because he has been good to me. I will write his word on my windows as a constant reminder that this life of mine is dedicated to his glory.
For someone who loves words so much, I really don' For someone who loves words so much, I really don't have many of them right now. 
.
On December 26, 2020 - after over a decade of fighting Corticobasal Degeneration, a rare progressive neurological disorder - my incredible, near-perfect Daddy left this world and has made his home with Jesus. Ever since then I've been struggling to find the words to pay homage to the most amazing man in the world. How do you sum up the life of someone who has impacted so many for good? How do I ever share how the little day-to-day expressions, smiles, words, wit, strength, grit, grace, humility, hard work and love have been woven into my very being? One of the last things I told him before he left was that there truly are no words yet for the kind of love he shared with me, my sister, and our beautiful mother. He was truly one-of-a-kind in every way, and we are so blessed because of the way he poured himself out for us. 
.
Daddy, I love you so much. The only thing that's softening the pain of your absence is knowing that those very last words I said to you - "I'll see you soon" - will come true because I know you'll be waiting for me in Heaven. My very own Daddy - you are always with me. I love you beyond words.
Just two gals who crushed a 50 minute run today! Just two gals who crushed a 50 minute run today! 

As we move into goal setting for the new year, may I suggest starting with your physical health? Not to fit the bikini body mold that society normalizes, but to actually BE as healthy as possible. When everything hit the fan for me this year I dug into two things that have been integral to creating positive growth and a healthier mindset: 

1️⃣ my relationship with God
2️⃣ my physical health

What that’s looked like for me on the health front: holding fast to my commitment to whole food nutrition, grace for the days when I choose otherwise, pushing myself to lift heavier in workouts, and taking up running again. 

What’s happened as a result? When I push myself physically, when I choose to practice discipline to do what I know is best for my body, it makes it infinitely easier to choose that same healthy discipline in every other area of life. You want to dominate your goals? Start with your health!
Remember when I blogged about food? 😂 Gosh the Remember when I blogged about  food? 😂 Gosh the past few months have been nuts. I’m still over here figuring out how to eat well without sacrificing my life in the kitchen, and this is a bowl I couldn’t NOT share with y’all. The best thing is that everything is almost always on hand in my fridge, it’s packed with nutrition, and tastes AMAZING!

In the bowl:
-rice mixed with Trader Joe’s Zhoug sauce
-broiled shredded Brussels sprouts
-chickpeas
-baby  arugula
-grilled chicken breast
-Romesco sauce (from Trader  Joe’s but I usually make my own)
-a little  tzaziki sauce

This meal has been on repeat all week, only changing the rice for riced cauliflower and omitting the chickpeas on low carb days. YUM! I find that if I have a variety of roasted veggies, grilled chicken, and a few different sauces on hand I can almost always come up with a great bowl for almost any meal!
It’s a beautiful day for Small Business Saturday It’s a beautiful day for Small Business Saturday y’all! Almost 4 years ago I took a leap of faith and said yes to this job in an effort to create another stream of revenue. I had NO CLUE that it would change my life for the better in almost every way, that it would reignite my passion for health and community, that it would provide in so many beautiful ways. But it has, and I am so thankful to all of you who have trusted me and supported me along the way. 

When you shop with a small business you are literally a hero in their eyes, validating and supporting and protecting them. You guys are my heroes, and I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️ 

#smallbusinesssaturday #happydance
Affirmations for YOU today. Even when you don’t Affirmations for YOU today. Even when you don’t feel it, these are truths that I’m holding for you. ❤️
3 things you can do RIGHT NOW to improve your day: 3 things you can do RIGHT NOW to improve your day:

1️⃣ SMILE! Even if you don’t feel like it, smiling (even forcing it to the point of feeling weird) has actually been scientifically proven to improve mood, lower stress, and boost your immune system. I actually recommend doing it awkwardly around other people because it’ll make them smile too 😉

2️⃣ GRATITUDE! Right now, before you talk yourself out of it, say or write 3 things you’re thankful for. Big, small, or in between. In this moment I’m going to say sticky notes, my Le Creuset Dutch Oven, and the Hamilton soundtrack. BOOM!

3️⃣MOVE! Get up off your tush, right now, and move your body. Walk around your house, do some jumping jacks, lock yourself in the bathroom and do a little dance, whatever. This isn’t about looking cool, it’s about giving yourself a better day. 

Things are hard, ambiguity and uncertainty isn’t fun, but we can control ONE THING: ourselves. Praying that you choose to gift yourself a little bit of happiness today! 

Now, tell me below, what’s one thing you’re thankful for RIGHT NOW?
HASHTAG MOOD. Y’all, I’m so jealous of my dog HASHTAG MOOD. Y’all, I’m so jealous of my dog 😂 Who else feels me here? 🙋🏼‍♀️ #dogdays #2020mood
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