The line “refuse to waste our lives, for you’re our joy and prize” gets me every time I hear or sing it; actually, let me take that back. I can’t really sing it without feeling like I just got the breath knocked out of me, choking over the words because I KNOW without a doubt that I am wasting my life, and I rarely see God as my joy and prize. Even in the throws of a beautiful growing relationship with Him I still get stuck on me, and I still waste my life on me. I still work so hard, straining to serve Heather and not God.
It hurts, you know? When you (I) realize that it’s all for naught when it’s all about me. A huge blow to the ego is never fun, but thank goodness for the second half of that line in the song – because when we see that God really is the joy and the prize it makes anything worth it. It’s all worth it. All of it. When I lose sight of Heather and have tunnel vision for Christ it makes sacrifice, faith, mercy, grace, forgiveness – it makes it all easy. It makes it holy.
And writing all of this out makes me want to hit my knees. So I’m going to go ahead and do that and I hope you guys will join me in praying the words of “Build Your Kingdom Here” over ourselves and this world 🙂