First of all, thank you so much for all of y’alls encouragement. I tried to downplay the panic attack the other day, but I’ve still been feeling it. It’s weird though – a big mixture of overjoyed-excited and panic-stricken, but all in the best way possible. If there’s anything to panic about in a good way I’d say that a baby’s it! We looked at a crib that we’re getting from an amazing friend of ours last night, and just seeing that put everything in perspective a little bit more. I think the fact that we know it’s a boy and we know what/where he’s going to be sleeping is helping to ease the fear a bit.
The funny thing to me is that I’m not afraid of the pain of childbirth…in fact, I think it’s absolutely awesome how something so beautiful (a baby) can come from something so painful as childbirth. My friend Stefanie told me the other day that they don’t call it a curse for nothing, but every single woman I’ve talked to would do it all again in a heartbeat because of the sweet baby on the other side. I don’t love pain but I am so excited to meet our little guy that the pain part just seems miniscule in comparison!
I suppose the scariest part about this whole motherhood thing is actually the taking care of a baby part. The breast feeding, the diaper changing, the scheduling (more on this later, but we definitely have no plans of making our baby the center of the world – although a semi-solid schedule has been proven to help!), the sleepless nights, the dogs getting used to the baby, knowing how to play with a baby, and the worry. Oh the worry! I know better than to worry, but I just can’t help but wonder how to raise a good kid. I’m hoping that a lot a LOT a LOT of love will help us get there…because that’s about the only thing I know how to do for him at this point.
In other news we are 21 weeks today and I’m hoping (please note that I said hoping) to post a few belly photos every now and then. Like I said in Monday’s post I don’t really feel like my belly is that big, but it is a really exciting time and the pregnant body is beautiful…we should celebrate! They may be iPhone photos, but I figure you guys will forgive me for that 🙂
So to end this fun little chat – anyone have ideas on how to to prepare for having a baby? That’s an open-ended question if I’ve ever heard one, but I’m down with any little tidbit you got!