Happy Thursday everyone! I hope yours is going as well as mine is thus far 🙂
Last night’s dinner was a little something I made up called Roasted Shrimp, Tomato, and Ricotta Pasta:
- 2 cartons of cherry or plum tomatoes
- 4-5 cloves garlic, left whole and in their skins
- 2 Tbsp olive oil, divided
- 40-50 small raw shrimp, deveined and tails removed, rinsed with water and pat dry with a paper towel
- 2 cups raw sliced mushrooms
- 2 Tbsp red wine vinegar
- 1 package whole wheat linguine
- 1 15-oz container of ricotta cheese (I think mine was part skim)
- 1/2 cup pasta water OR skim milk
Cook pasta according to package directions. Drain and set to the side. Toss tomatoes and whole garlic cloves in olive oil and roast for 10-20 minutes in a 425 degree oven, tossing every 5 minutes or so until caramelized. Do not let the garlic burn. Transfer to a plate, and when cool enough remove the skins from the garlic cloves and mash with a fork. Toss shrimp with the remaining Tbsp of olive oil. Spread on the baking sheet and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Roast for about 7-8 minutes at 425, or until done. Meanwhile in a pot combine the garlic cloves and mushrooms over medium heat, stirring constantly. Deglaze with the red wine vinegar. Once the mushrooms start to look a little done, add the tomatoes, ricotta, and pasta water OR milk. Stir until combined and heated through. Add the shrimp and the pasta, and stir until everything is coated. Done!
After dinner we watched Modern Family, then I went upstairs and made lime-coconut bars (recipe coming later today) and banana bread. It made our house smell so tropical! When everything was done baking I decided to go upstairs and pamper myself a little using these great samples I won from Janna!
The top one is a face wash (smelled AH-mazing), then some moisturizer, a pore-shrinking mask, and some eye gel. It all worked SO WELL, and smelled like I was in a fancy spa. I felt pretty good after my self-pampering, and went to bed!
This morning I got up and did some yoga, then started the day off with about 1/3 cup nonfat yogurt (all that was left in the container), a Tbsp of Bonne Maman Cherry Preserves, and about 1/2 cup of pumpkin granola. Yum!
So yes, last night. I was not OK at all. And honestly I don’t really know what triggered it, but as soon as we got home I burst into tears. It was like any shred of self-confidence I ever had burst into flames and melted away. I think the fact that my knee hurts and severely limits my activity was/is a huge factor in this, but basically I can feel all of the hard work I’ve put in since November towards my weight loss just slipping away. I know I could limit what I eat more, and I’m trying, but the thing is I love being active, and now I can’t even do that. One of the few things I could do to center myself and feel OK with the world is being stripped away, and I don’t know what to do with it.
It’s times like this that I know I’m being watched over though. While I curled up on the bed, sobbing my eyes out, my husband came in and held my and talked to me. He said a lot of things that I didn’t want to hear because I was somehow finding comfort in wallowing in my own self-pity. But you know what? Those things he said are exactly what I needed to hear. And then this morning I read this post on Tina’s blog, and I just knew that it was posted on this day for me to read (whether she knows that or not :))
Something Nate said to me the other day is that ever since he’s known me I’ve never been one to just give up. I guess I felt like I lost that person, but you know what? I’m not giving up. Not after I’ve worked so hard to get the point where I am today. Yes it’s going to be a rough road and there will be tears, but there will also be a lot of love and a lot of prayer. And there will be success – a success that isn’t a number on the scale or a size in pants, but success in loving the woman that God created me to be. It doesn’t get much more successful than that!
Do you feel like you’re successful? What do you define success as? How do you want to change to feel better about yourself (IF you feel that way)? When I really sit down and look at my life, I would definitely say that I’m successful in just about every area of life except for my own perception of my beauty. I’m smart, athletic, kind of funny (I think so anyway), a good cook, a good fur-mom, a good daughter/sister/friend/wife. The thing is I want to see those things more consistently and learn to love the way I look as well. Have any of you ever gone from despising the way you look to loving it? What steps did you take to get there?